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A Council Christmas Tale; Merry Christmas to all
Topic Started: 24 Dec 2016, 10:21 PM (454 Views)
Posted ImageX I S T S
Elite Member II
Gather around good people and listen to my tale of good cheer


It twas the night before Christmas and the TBE council were out on the town

They spent hours and hours in the pub waiting but Jungle was never a around

After ages waiting for him to come, Mr Mooged said hes probably under the thumb

'Right!' said Toiletbreak as he slid out from under the table. 'Well we just have to go get him... if were able...'

They all decided to walk to his house, fresh air hit Alex like a hammer as he dribbled and stammered

Warning lights came on as we shuffled up the drive but we were hoping to get warm inside

A figure answered the door all ready for bed! 'Under the THUMB!' it was heard to be said. The poor chap is socially dead!

He said to the crowd now gathered outside in the cold, 'Sorry my friends but its time for me to go to bed, Iíve been told'

Slam when the door and off when the light, 'Christmas spirit by S H I T E!'

The Wise piped in with his yearly good thought during banter, 'We can get in like Santa!'

A ladder was found and up they went, though when Tixy got on the ladder I thought 'I donít remember it being that bent!?!'

They all stood around the top of the chimney by the light of a star when TB piped in 'its too small for Tixys arse by far!'

Then with a huff and a puff Tixy let loose such wind, with a shower of smuts they were all blown straight in!

The curse of the munchies has befell our troop, it had left Wise Choice was in need of a poop!

After 30 minutes in the little boys room a smell started to appear, Wise said as he left quickly through the door saying 'I think some things died in here!'

Alex was now starting to sober as they entered the kitchen when he spotted the brandy and carrot left out for Santa.

Alex drunk the brandy from the glass then the bottle then finished the carrot which was crunchie... Darn it he thought now I have the muchies!

First to the fridge was Mooged like a ghost and before you could blink heíd devoured half the roast!

Next went the cold meats, trifle and the cheese platter when from upstairs came a creek so our band thought best to scatter

After what seemed an age no sound was to be heard, then Wise whispered low 'lets just grab his spirits and go!'

They opened the first and its seemed to flow, the second and third went the same way too, then it was Tixys turn to pass out in the loo

After returning from the kitchen Alex looked at the tree... 'Iíve had a wicked thought... thats coming with me!'

They stacked what they could in the porch and by the door, the rest of bits were put in a sack. When his balance returned it was swung on his back.

Then a man in a van appeared through the snow, to take all the swag as quick as we could go.

The house was picked clean and all that was left was their bed and a rat, thatís for treating us like that!

XISTS knew a man who asked no questions were told, to him we all went and the contents were sold.

The money was split which paid for their night and takeout if was for told, though Jungle would wake up out in the cold.


TBE council wishes a good night and a Merry Christmas to all.



After being visited by the ghost of Christmas past several times... as well as the police twice
XISTS was convinced its either Hell or be nice
This month there will be no boots for those below four
But please try to do better next year or you will be shown the door.
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